G.O.B.: (Tooth whistles.) That was subtle. It’s not the way you’re supposed to treat a brother. I said some things, and I got a little carried away. ![]() Michael: G.O.B., can I talk to you for a sec? Listen, um. G.O.B.: You should call this a “G.O.B.,” guy. Michael: Is there a chat room that you guys all.? I don’t thing he’s going to do it for you after you wouldn’t even give him a frozen banana, Michael. George, Sr.: You better tell him I’m asking. George, Sr.: Michael, you lied to your investors. Just break into the permit office, slip the application into the next file and then tell them “Hey, you guys screwed up.” George, Sr.: Hey, listen, about that permit thing, that’s an easy fix. I feel like the prettiest girl at the dance. But honestly, I don’t even want to choose. I’m trying to decide which gang to align myself with. I’m trying to get my newsletter off the ground. George, Sr.: I’m under a lot of pressure here. We think we found a part of a pterodactyl under Fashion Island. Michael: Hey, Busty, have you been using Dad’s car?īuster: I have been a part of this archaeological dig. Lucille: No, they’re not going to call your name. ![]() I don’t want you to think I’m taking this more seriously than you are, unless you’re planning some grand romantic gesture, my feelings are just the teensiest bit hurt. I’ve still got those Producers tickets, and I’d love to share them with you. And Lucille had been pursuing him ever since. After inadvertently flirting with her at a social event while not wearing his glasses. Narrator: Buster was hiding from Lucille Austero. Lucille: Where did he go? Buster! Why do you hide every time the doorbell rings? Lucille: Oh, I think there’s a certain bachelor who won’t mind coming home with me at the end of the evening. Lucille 2: You must have scrimped and saved for these. But that’s of no use to a woman whose vertigo makes flying a grotesque misadventure. Lucille: I got you tickets to The Producers. Narrator: In fact, Lucille Bluth had made sure of that. Lucille: I care about going for more money than Lucille Austero. Michael: You’re doing that? You can’t possibly tell me that you care about the wetlands. I’ve got to get ready for the bachelorette auction. Michael: You’ve never actually set foot in a supermarket, have you? You’re the one who charged his own brother for a Bluth frozen banana. Narrator: So Michael went to find Buster. Michael: There is a schedule? I’ve always tried so hard not to look at this thing. ![]() Michael: All right, you know what? I will start doing my charity work when you start doing yours. And even after he gave you the rights to his “Mr. You just do it because you love being the guy in charge. Lindsay: Oh, you don’t do it for us, Michael. I mean, you’re like the least-charitable person I know. You don’t even know what the auction’s for tonight. You just do all this charity crap just to stroke your ego. Lindsay: You just go to dinner with the guy. Michael: The bachelorette auction? You know you’re married. Lindsay: I had to get ready for the bachelorette auction. Lindsay: (Gasps.) That color’s discontinued! Narrator: Lindsay had such an emergency three days earlier when her salon was able to squeeze her in at the last moment. Well, obviously I’m going to use it if it’s an emergency. The one you didn’t tell me that you had, even though I had to ride my bicycle to work all week. Lindsay: What car? I don’t know what you’re talking about. Narrator: Michael then went to his sister to find his father’s car. No more banana grabbing, no more car grabbing. If you want to use my likeness for a Hamburglar-type character, I’ll sign off on that. Narrator: Michael wanted his father’s car, so he went to confront his brother G.O.B. George, Sr.: All right, this is what we’re going to do. George, Sr.: There’s no ice cream in the car. had always been overprotective of his cars. Michael: No, Dad would never go for that. Kitty: Why don’t you just take your dad’s car? Well, I’ve got to ride my bike out to the prison and talk to my dad about this. Michael: So, I just lied to the investors? ![]() Michael: But my dad filed the permits before he went to jail. Michael: The permits have been filed absolutely on time. Investor: So there’s no screwups with the permits this time? It had also caused problems in his presentation to the Bluth Company investors. Narrator: Michael Bluth always rode his bike to work, but the recent heat wave had taken some of the fun out of it. Narrator: Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything and the one son who had no choice but to keep them all together. "Charity Drive" was written by Barbie Adler. The following is the transcript of the Season One episode " Charity Drive".
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